Pedestrians beware of the craziest of all attempts to swindle you from your hard earned money. It’s not the worst because it tries to sell you goods of little value or even take much of your money. No, it’s the craziest of all because it will come in the form of an old guy who will stop you, waste what time you’re kind enough to patronize, vandalize what goods you have on hand, and then still have the gall to ask for money in trade for it.
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It sounds like a strange one, I know, but it’s very real. I never read of it before I experienced it myself, but I did later. I was in Beijing when I met this guy. I was in a mall and searching frantically for a public bathroom when he intercepted me. I mistook him for a kindly old man in a market, the sort who want to share wisdom and learn from you alike, but he wasn’t this kind. No, he was something much worse than that.
He told me a bunch of useless facts about China, any of which could be learned in a single page of text online that you still wouldn’t read. He asked me some questions that he didn’t listen for the answer to, and then he stole my pen, scratched it up with some Chinese characters, and asked me for money for the luxury of my time and attention having thusly been stolen.
If you encounter a crazy old man who wants money for his unsolicited information about China and some illegible scratches he puts on your pen or other personal property without your desire, rebuke him. Once you figure out what he’s all about, just walk away. Your job is not to provide a living for such leeches and the only way to convince them that they need a more legitimate job is to ignore them as soon as you’re able.
These people are not sanctioned by the government, and if you called the police they would likely be in trouble. I don’t suggest you get them in trouble, what I suggest is that you send them on their way. You don’t need to pay someone for wasting your time and vandalizing your property. Your wasted time alone is worth more than he hopes to get, so you should hold out your hand and beg him give you some money instead.
This is the weakest of all scams, as it seems quite passive, but it’s no less your responsibility to aid this profession to a swift death.
